I give an old lady a dollar and she starts to cry A little boy comes up to me and asks me for money “If my mother knew i asked for money she would slap me its my first time”…he says The crack addict on the corner is waiting for me to give him something to eat and its hot as hell in New York City Such a big city and people still alone some not afraid to ask for help some retreat into their apartments and make a small world of their own feeling safe from the masses Seems like I am constantly sweating and people are checking me out knowing that even though I might be of color i ain’t from these parts Sun light in one part of the sky and a dark cloud waaaay over there with thunder booms off in the distance In front of me a little black girl with her hair needing to be braided over a month ago keeps looking back at me while holding her Mothers hand like she knows too “you ain’t from these parts” She has in her other hand a Big leaf and holds it up like a prized possesion in this concrete jungle her clothes dirty and her smile to me is priceless and free passing present and future A gift will come at many times of our lives moments the devine showing us we are not alone and moments when need to look very closely to what all the universe puts forth for us if you are not listening or really seeing then you may not hear what you need to hear be what you need to be love who you need to love you just may miss out on the biggest gift and lesson coming your way
i wake up in the morning thinking why and how as i move through the streets of NYC I almost feel robotic and with every step in defiance of becoming a cog in this big metropolis
Yesterday I talked to the children about courage and inner strength i spoke to them about how their courage to walk away from violence on the streets of NYC is their strength and their weakness is when they choose to respond to someones anger As i moved across the room i touch the chest of a ten year old and then his head and i say “Show me the courage in your hearts and in your minds Today tell me how strong you are and why People are always trying to break us down call us names but there are some things they will never be able to take from us remember that” I sit back and watch them create Some come up and say “Look what i did” They need affirmation and encouragement at all times My words sparked something in them and their eyes showed me what i was missing in my life the same young man whos chest i touched brings me a picture of his heart I ask wow that is your heart? Well now what do you feel..write me something He writes “When I am strong I have a good heart” I tried not to cry for i was touched and i said good job At that moment my why was answered and my how is all about the love i give and get i see love in the eyes of the children Our children need to express themselves in healthy ways They have to be able to look within and celebrate all the beauty they have We as adults must always tell them they can do better if only they focus and leave the negativity in the dark If you can plant a seed of hope, courage and love into the minds of the children then your life on this earth short or long will not be lived in vain.
hmm beauty to me is about spirit and not about body and beauty is empty without the kiss of mother nature or without his hand in my hand on a Sunny day it is shallow without the feel of family around you and beauty is fatal without the chance to ever look into your childs eyes and see you and him… beauty only bleeds vanity without truth…
My first class went well with my college students. I found them to be open to creative expression. We had a very serious conversation around the therapeutic elements to digging deep, letting go, sharing and most importantly finding that inner voice. One student said this class is what she needed for she had a hard time expressing herself and being open. When she did she felt very vulnerable. She also shared with all of us that she felt very lonely and felt the need to express this. A tear was falling down her cheeck. Another student claimed she had lost everything…her mate her home and being creative was a tool for her to document change and progress from outside of the abyss she felt she had fallen into. She too shed a tear. I was holding back mine. Some students simply let me know they have not nurtured both sides of the brain. Their stories and the passion they expressed kind of pulled me up and out of my self. For i was no longer in my life but experiencing theirs. I told them that …sharing our thoughts and visions about our lives .. questioning our place in this world…..how we function how we struggle and how we overcome will serve as a spring board to grow into better individuals. Then the conversation turned into how great it is to come through the fire and get to the other side. I am the Professor but that day they helped me to regain a little bit of hope and optimism. Loneliness is a funny thing yet as I told one of my students…it is also a blessing. It helps us to look deeper into our lives and see whats missing. Have you ever been lonely when you are in a close relationship? I have. Question that relationship!!! Have you ever felt lonely in a community that was not about who you are!!! Move!!! Over the fourth of July weekend I am alone. I am also questioning all situations.To be alone is also a choice. To reflect to think about your next moves and to remember why you are here. Do you serve a purpose to the good of mankind or are you a leech. My body and Spirit are regaining strength. The move was hard on me but for the better. I feel an even bigger change coming my way.
